Okay, well I’m back. That non-disclosure agreement is pretty ironclad, so I’m glad I checked. There’s really nothing I’m allowed to say about the numerous top secret projects I was involved in while I worked there at YETI. I can tell you the Tuesday lunch special in the cafeteria was tacos. But other than Taco Tuesday, I can’t say much. Definitely not a word about the Friday lunch special. In fact I’ve already said too much. Just forget that Friday came up at all, okay?

I can maybe give you a small hint about one top secret YETI project for which I was a test subject. I can’t tell you what the project was studying obviously, but it rhymes with “climb gravel.” It was right at the beginning of my YETI career and then several years later toward the end, and then sort of in the middle for a bit. Never on Friday, of course. Forget I mentioned Friday, please.

I thoroughly enjoyed my time at YETI, but all good things must come to an end. I had decided to pursue a career as a high-paid consultant. I was young and naïve, though. I overlooked two important facts in my business plan: 1) “consultants” typically have an acknowledged expertise in a specific field that makes other businesses want to bring them on as consultants; and 2) “high-paid” is a designation that is open to the payer’s interpretation.